The Problem or the Person
When dealing with an employee relations concern, it is easy to look at the people involved. If it is a performance issue, we wonder why the person has decided to underperform, or if the person lacks the skill or education to meet expectations. If it is a conflict between employees, we quickly deduce who is to blame for the breakdown in civility and devise a remedy in accordance with our assessment. This approach makes sense. It works. But is it the best approach?

What if, instead of focusing on the people involved, we focus on the problem instead? When re-reviewing the performance issue, we should reflect on our hiring process. Did the person seem to have the skill and education to perform the job? If yes, did they embellish their resume? Once we deduce the answer to this question is no, we should take an adequate amount of time to determine what is occurring. In conversations with the employee, is it possible to ascertain whether external factors are creating a deterioration in performance? Sometimes, personal issues bleed into the workplace, and an expression of dignity towards employees means giving them a period of time to work through those personal issues such that they can turn around their work performance. Perhaps they are not in the right job. If the employee lacks passion for the work, performance may suffer. Before firing the person, it may be wise to explore whether there is a better seat at the table to maximize their skillset and drive.
When two employees do not get along, what if we change the lens with which everyone views the dispute. It is typical to focus on the behaviors of the people involved, but we might consider looking at the problem instead. If everyone, the disputants and the leaders charged with overseeing the resolution to the dispute, focused their energy on deciphering where the breakdown occurred and how to repair it, the matter might get fixed without anyone in particular being blamed and disciplined for the dispute. For example, in one situation employee A (let’s call her Mary) was having challenges with employee B (let’s call her Beth). Mary felt Beth talked over her in meetings, demeaned the contributions of others, and caused others on the team to shrink and discontinue contributing to meeting dialogue. Beth, in turn, felt that Mary tended to slow down meetings by constantly seeking clarification of points – causing meetings to run long. Without validating the concerns of either party, one potential way to move this forward and towards resolution is for the team leader to take firm control of meetings and ensure everyone gets a chance to contribute, no one talks over someone else, and that meetings always end on time. Adding some slight formalities and overarching rules of engagement to meetings can ameliorate the tensions between the people around the table.
By removing the focus on the people and, instead, attacking the problem, issues can come to effective resolutions. This type of dispute resolution work takes a bit more time, but the end result will likely be more lasting – and create increased morale for all involved. Most importantly, it helps to retain employees. This does not mean that there won't be times when people do need to transition from a position or the company itself, but infusing dignity into the process can help exhaust all other options before coming to the ultimate decision to part ways.
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